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| I only seem to blog when I'm emoSo yeah, I'm not that bad right now. But I am thinking about a lot of stuff,; what I want to do this summer, what I wanna achieve, things I wanna see, goals that need to be accomplished, etc etc. Honestly, it's not me afraid of not getting things done. It's more the fact of whether or not I really want to and will it make me happy?
Well anyways, on the lighter news, work is great and I'm happy with that. I don't take care of the kids anymore, but I do plan to visit them soon just to see how they are and let them know I'm still alive. Granted the fact they don't know the usual normal drinking everything horrible that smells and taste like gasoline and smoke like a chimney ways, for all they know or assume I could be across the other side of the global on a crazy adventure which maybe this summer I might be doing. But yeah, I wanna see my kids, I miss them.
I want to do some traveling this summer, but before that I need to get my money and go to the gym. Why do I need to go to the gym? really random right? seriously, its because I feel like I won't deserve going if I'm just going to be a fatty. I was doing really well until I got full time hours last week. I plan to make it in at least three times this week.
I still need to make my weapons for cosplay. Enough said, I been holding this shit off for like a year now lol.
Well, I back on my normal work schedule for this week which is, work every day lol. I will have my days off again on Monday. But I want the money to get my plans started.
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| Nothing interestingto write except the fact I'm really tired right now, and I think I'm going to sleep during 4th of July after my work shift is over. I have nothing planned and I couldn't sleep night so I will do it later after work. Maybe I will look after my last entry and make a better one than this later.
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| Now that I took the time to lick my wounds, time to take back what is mine........and that is greatness. No more crying, no more bitching. I will take back what is rightfully mine and what I deserve. No one will now will tell me that I will fail because I will not listen. I will kick logic to the curb and do the impossible. I will start by going back into the gym! Seriously, not drunk right now. I just need to get my self esteem back into awesome. Don't believe in you who believes me, don't believe in me who believes in you, believe in you who believes in yourself.
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| for once, I feel ordinaryI haven't blogged in a log ass time due to the fact that I'm constantly busy and I just haven't felt like it. These last few weeks I haven't felt exactly great, in other words, I feel like my stress is causing my depressing and leaving me feeling unmotivated to do anything even to play video games. Right now I feel like I should just rot in my bed. I feel like I'm not special, I'm not smart and I should just give up. For once in a long time, I just want to be ordinary. I don't wanna achieve anything great, I don't want anything anymore. I don't want to even be happy. I just want to be content and I just don't wanna be miserable. Maybe next time I blog, I won't feel the same way I do now.
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| School BlowsSchool blows this quarter because I had to take Spanish, really nothing wrong it with, I just dislike taking classes because of the shear fact I have to. I hate how forgien language is a requirement in good 4 year schools, but I do understand why I have to jump this stupid hoop. If I want it that bad, I will jump even if the hoop is on fire. Anyways, besides school and being stressed out and not liking it AT ALL, life is pretty grand and I'm really happy and enjoying it. I'm just waiting for the summer because I feel like a new chapter of my life is about to start. Just working again and working on my hobbies on my free time is what I'm really looking forward to. Especially getting more tattoos.
Today's results for the work out, since I didn't have a pull up bar, I went ahead and did Bottem to Bottem Squats and Holding at the Top Push Ups for Tabata work out.
Push Up - 12 10 11 8 8 7 7 7 Total 7
Sit Up - 9 9 9 9 9 9 9 9 Total 9
Squats - 20 16 12 9 9 8 8 9 Total 8
Score 24
And since I really didn't work out yesterday, I did it 10 minutes after my Tabata. 150 Burpees for time, 12:40
I might be lazy and not do work outs sometimes, but I will push myself to make up for it.
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